How to Fart on Command
So… you like farting and you enjoy hearing others fart. You’ve heard that some boys can fart whenever they want to, and of course you want to know how!
Well, not all people can do it. But with some practice and patience, it should come to you.
So here it is… How to Fart on Command!
1) Get a pillow and a soft surface.
2) Place your ear on the pillow with your head turned sideways.
3) Put your butt up in the air, bringing your knees as close up to your head as possible. This relaxes your anal opening.
4) Once you’re relaxed enough, you should feel a strange sensation…this is air traveling into your colon (intestines).
5) Through practice you will be able to do this by just sitting down.
6) Force the air back out…aka Fart!
There’s more to it than just “relaxing” … you kind of have to find a way to pull air into your rectum. Getting down in that position opens you up naturally, so it’s a good starting position… what you should do then is tense your stomach muscles. When you tense your stomach muscles, you’ll feel your butt muscles tighten. Once you’ve tensed them, release tension, and then reapply it. Keep doing that, and you might feel air building up back there. It may only be a small bit at first, but it’ll get bigger the better you get at it.
Over time you should be able to skip a few steps, and just be able to fart by bending down on the ground, or even better, just by litterally “sucking in” and “blowing out.” Don’t believe me? Check some of the videos on this site out… or better yet, let Methane Junior here show how it’s done!:
Comment on this post if you have any other tips or resources!